Good guilt vs. bad guilt - Revision history

Mxmsj: /* Links */

2024-01-22T16:31:50Z

Links

← Older revision		Revision as of 18:31, 22 January 2024
Line 251:		Line 251:
	== Links ==		== Links ==

	* ~~::-~~ [https://www.johnbradshaw.com/books/healing-the-shame-that-binds-you John Bradshaw, ''Healing the Shame That Binds You.'']		* [https://www.johnbradshaw.com/books/healing-the-shame-that-binds-you John Bradshaw, ''Healing the Shame That Binds You.'']

	* [http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupanon.htm ''Scrupulous Anonymous.'']		* [http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupanon.htm ''Scrupulous Anonymous.'']

Mxmsj: /* Shame is like mold */

2024-01-19T18:38:41Z

Shame is like mold

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:38, 19 January 2024
Line 98:		Line 98:
	It is very wrong to think, "If God loved me — or if I loved God — then I would never be tempted by feelings like this (pride, lust, anger, resentment, fear, anxiety, etc.). Good people feel good all the time. Since I don't feel good, I must not be good."		It is very wrong to think, "If God loved me — or if I loved God — then I would never be tempted by feelings like this (pride, lust, anger, resentment, fear, anxiety, etc.). Good people feel good all the time. Since I don't feel good, I must not be good."

	== Shame is like mold ==		== Shame is meant to safeguard intimacy ==

			; ''Youcat'' (464)

			: What good is shame?

			: Shame safeguards a person's intimate space: his mystery, his most personal and inmost being, his dignity, but especially his capacity for love and sexual self-giving. It relates also to that which only love may see. Many young Christians live in an environment where it is taken for granted that everything should be on display and people are systematically trained to ignore feelings of shame. But shamelessness is inhuman. Animals experience no shame. In a human being, in contrast, it is an essential feature. It does not hide something inferior but rather protects something valuable, namely, the dignity of the person in his capacity to love. The feeling of shame is found in all cultures, although it assumes different forms. It has nothing to do with prudery or a repressive upbringing. A person is also ashamed of his sins and other things that would demean him if they were made generally known. Someone who offends another person's natural feeling of shame by words, glances, gestures, or actions robs him of his dignity.

			=== Toxic shame is like mold ===

	It grows in the dark and dies in the light.		It grows in the dark and dies in the light.

Mxmsj at 11:27, 16 January 2024

2024-01-16T11:27:38Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 13:27, 16 January 2024
Line 13:		Line 13:
	\|-		\|-
	\| Objective		\| Objective
			"Just a description, not an indictment" (Al-Anon ACOA).
	\| Subjective		\| Subjective
			"Too painful to think about."
	\|-		\|-
	\| Cleanses		\| Cleanses

Mxmsj at 11:26, 16 January 2024

2024-01-16T11:26:08Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 13:26, 16 January 2024
Line 4:		Line 4:

	"Jesus, I trust in You" (St. Faustina).		"Jesus, I trust in You" (St. Faustina).

			"Jesus, I surrender myself to you. Take care of everything" [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dolindo_Ruotolo (Servant of God Don Dolindo Ruotolo).]

	{\|{{Prettytable}}		{\|{{Prettytable}}

Mxmsj: /* Links */

2024-01-16T11:23:20Z

Links

← Older revision		Revision as of 13:23, 16 January 2024
Line 238:		Line 238:

	== Links ==		== Links ==

			* ::- [https://www.johnbradshaw.com/books/healing-the-shame-that-binds-you John Bradshaw, ''Healing the Shame That Binds You.'']

	* [http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupanon.htm ''Scrupulous Anonymous.'']		* [http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupanon.htm ''Scrupulous Anonymous.'']
	* [http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupulosity.htm ''Scrupulous Anonymous,'' "Ten Commandments for the Scrupulous."]		* [http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupulosity.htm ''Scrupulous Anonymous,'' "Ten Commandments for the Scrupulous."]

Mxmsj: /* Links */

2023-08-18T22:24:30Z

Links

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:24, 19 August 2023
Line 241:		Line 241:
	* [http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupulosity.htm ''Scrupulous Anonymous,'' "Ten Commandments for the Scrupulous."]		* [http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupulosity.htm ''Scrupulous Anonymous,'' "Ten Commandments for the Scrupulous."]
	* [http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupulosity2.htm ''Scrupulous Anonymous,'' "Ten Commandments for the Scrupulous (Revised)."]		* [http://mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupulosity2.htm ''Scrupulous Anonymous,'' "Ten Commandments for the Scrupulous (Revised)."]
			* [https://livefreerecoverynh.com/resources/ Live Free Recovery Resources, based in New Hampshire]

	[[Category:Depression]]		[[Category:Depression]]

Mxmsj: /* Shame is like mold */

2023-08-18T21:38:04Z

Shame is like mold

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:38, 18 August 2023
Line 104:		Line 104:
	This kind of shame is an enemy, not a friend.		This kind of shame is an enemy, not a friend.

	It can lead us to wallow in guilt instead of taking healthy actions and adopting healthy attitudes that will set us free from "the bondage of the past" ([[The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous\|AA Big Book]], third-step prayer:		It can lead us to wallow in guilt instead of taking healthy actions and adopting healthy attitudes that will set us free from "the bondage of the past" ([[The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous\|AA Big Book]], third-step prayer):

	:: O God, I offer you my self, to build with me and to do with me as you will. Relieve me of the bondage of self that I may better do your well. Take away my difficulties that victory over these difficulties may help me bear witness to those I would help of your power, your love, and your way of life."		:: O God, I offer you my self, to build with me and to do with me as you will. Relieve me of the bondage of self that I may better do your well. Take away my difficulties that victory over these difficulties may help me bear witness to those I would help of your power, your love, and your way of life."

Mxmsj: /* Shame is like mold */

2023-08-18T21:37:37Z

Shame is like mold

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:37, 18 August 2023
Line 104:		Line 104:
	This kind of shame is an enemy, not a friend.		This kind of shame is an enemy, not a friend.

	It can lead us to wallow in guilt instead of taking healthy actions and adopting healthy attitudes that will set us free from "the bondage of the past" [[The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous\|(AA Big Book).]]		It can lead us to wallow in guilt instead of taking healthy actions and adopting healthy attitudes that will set us free from "the bondage of the past" ([[The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous\|AA Big Book]], third-step prayer:

			:: O God, I offer you my self, to build with me and to do with me as you will. Relieve me of the bondage of self that I may better do your well. Take away my difficulties that victory over these difficulties may help me bear witness to those I would help of your power, your love, and your way of life."

	== Sirach 41:14-22 — 42:1-8 ==		== Sirach 41:14-22 — 42:1-8 ==

Mxmsj: /* Sirach 41:14-22 — 42:1-8 */

2023-08-18T21:34:39Z

Sirach 41:14-22 — 42:1-8

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:34, 18 August 2023
Line 93:		Line 93:

	It is very wrong to think, "If God loved me — or if I loved God — then I would never be tempted by feelings like this (pride, lust, anger, resentment, fear, anxiety, etc.). Good people feel good all the time. Since I don't feel good, I must not be good."		It is very wrong to think, "If God loved me — or if I loved God — then I would never be tempted by feelings like this (pride, lust, anger, resentment, fear, anxiety, etc.). Good people feel good all the time. Since I don't feel good, I must not be good."

			== Shame is like mold ==

			It grows in the dark and dies in the light.

			Shaming ourselves can be a survival strategy that now is killing us. We can use self-shaming to try to control our behavior and to demonstrate to others around us that we want to comply with their expectations.

			Such defense mechanisms may help us over the short run, but they leave us crippled in the long run.

			This kind of shame is an enemy, not a friend.

			It can lead us to wallow in guilt instead of taking healthy actions and adopting healthy attitudes that will set us free from "the bondage of the past" [[The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous\|(AA Big Book).]]

	== Sirach 41:14-22 — 42:1-8 ==		== Sirach 41:14-22 — 42:1-8 ==

Mxmsj: Text replacement - "--" to " — "

2022-12-10T10:03:54Z

Text replacement - "--" to " — "

← Older revision		Revision as of 12:03, 10 December 2022
Line 41:		Line 41:
	\|-		\|-
	\| Proportionate to wrongdoing (rational)		\| Proportionate to wrongdoing (rational)
	\| Disproportionate--"scruples" (irrational)		\| Disproportionate — "scruples" (irrational)
	\|-		\|-
	\| A gift of the Holy Spirit		\| A gift of the Holy Spirit
Line 92:		Line 92:
	* We are not bad people when we have bad feelings.		* We are not bad people when we have bad feelings.

	It is very wrong to think, "If God loved me--or if I loved God--then I would never be tempted by feelings like this (pride, lust, anger, resentment, fear, anxiety, etc.). Good people feel good all the time. Since I don't feel good, I must not be good."		It is very wrong to think, "If God loved me — or if I loved God — then I would never be tempted by feelings like this (pride, lust, anger, resentment, fear, anxiety, etc.). Good people feel good all the time. Since I don't feel good, I must not be good."

	== Sirach 41:14-22 -- 42:1-8 ==		== Sirach 41:14-22 — 42:1-8 ==
	{\|		{\|
	\|-		\|-