Choosing the right good

Grace builds on nature

"Virtue is the mean between extremes."

The Catechism discusses the virtuous life in detail:

- Theological virtues: faith, hope, and love. These are supernatural gifts that cause us to share in God's own life. They place us in a relationship that we could not have without God's personal, salvific action in our lives.

- Cardinal virtues: prudence, justice, fortitude (patience, endurance), moderation (temperance).

- Prudential judgments: applying general norms to particular situations.

- - This is the Goldilocks world. In these kinds of decisions, we can err by doing too much or too little. "Moderation in all things" (except sin!): we don't want to eat too much or too little, rest too much or too little, spend too much or too little, etc.

Spiritual Exercises

St. Ignatius Loyola, SJ: Two different kinds of "discernment of spirits" in the Spiritual Exercises:

First Principle and Foundation

"We are created to praise, reverence, and serve God our Lord, and by this means to save our souls. All other creatures on the face of the earth are created by God to help us attain the end for which we are created. Therefore, I should use created things just as much as (tantum) they help me to attain my end and refrain from using them just as much as (quantum) they keep me from attaining my end. I must make myself indifferent to all created things as much as is left to my free choice and is not forbidden. In making such free choices, consequently, I ought not to seek health rather than sickness, wealth rather than poverty, honor rather than dishonor, a long life rather than a short one, and so on in all other matters. I ought to desire and choose only that which is more conducive to the end for which I am created."

The principle of "tantum quantum" is based on prudential judgments about what is and is not helpful in knowing, loving, and serving God. What is helpful and appropriate for one person may not be helpful or appropriate for another.

What we all need is detachment: the inner spiritual readiness and power to let go of good things that might get in the way of loving God.

First week: break with sin

- First week: recognize and reject the temptation to break the commandments. John Paul II: four universal negative prohibitions: no murder, adultery, theft, or lying. Tommy DiLorenzo: "You don't pray about whether to commit adultery. God has already told us all we need to know about that temptation."

Second week: Choose wisely between good and good

- Second week: recognizing and choosing the right good. Most of the choices we face in life are of this kind. How should we pray? What is our vocation? Whom should we marry? Where should we live and work? How should we invest the wealth God has given us? When should we call or write The Station of the Cross with a question?
  - The temptation of perfectionism: when the enemy of our human nature realizes that he cannot tempt us to break the commandments (temptations of the first week), he "comes to us as an angel of light" (2 Corinthians 11:14) and tempts us to do the wrong good or to do good intemperately.
  - There have been many forms of Christian perfectionism down through the centuries. Some Pharisees tried to impose the whole of the old Law on Gentile converts; Pharisaism is a continual temptation for us when we pay too much attention to the legalistic dimension of the gospel and neglect God's gracious sovereignty. Variations: Pelagianism, Jansenism, Puritanism.
  - Two ways to go wrong: too little concern for what God asks of us (being unscrupulous) and too much concern (scrupulosity). "Perfectionism breeds depression." God does invite and expect us to become perfect--we all have a common vocation to become saints--but the work of being transformed into "other Christs" is done more by God's love poured into our hearts than by self-will. We do have our part in it, of course--"Grace cooperates with nature"--but grace comes first.
  - Catholic minimalism: "What is the very least I have to do not to go to hell?"
  - Catholic maximalism: Turning ideals into laws. "If you don't make the sign of the Cross every time you pray, you are not a good Catholic."

Some Ignatian prayers

Prayer for Generosity

Dearest Lord, teach me to be generous.

Teach me to serve You as You deserve:
  to give and not to count the cost,
  to fight and not to heed the wounds,
  to toil and not to seek for rest,
  to labor and to ask for no reward,
    save that of knowing that I am doing your will.

Anima Christi

Soul of Christ, sanctify me.
Body of Christ, save me.
Blood of Christ, inebriate me.
Water from the side of Christ, wash me.
Passion of Christ, strengthen me.
O, good Jesus, hear me.
Within Thy wounds, hide me.
Never let me be separated from Thee.
From the wicked foe, defend me
And at the hour of my death,
Call me and bid me come to Thee,
That with Thy angels and saints
I may praise Thee forever in eternity. Amen.

Take and Receive (The Suscipe)

Take, Lord, and receive all my liberty,
my memory, my understanding,
and my entire will,
All I have and call my own.

You have given all to me.
To you, Lord, I return it.

Everything is yours; do with it what you will.
Give me only your love and your grace,
that is enough for me.

This is the Loyola Press translation. It doesn't quite match the way I say the prayer myself (which is entirely mixed up with two competing musical versions), but the essential ideas are all there.

Disordered imagination

The enemy comes to us as an angel of light, quoting Scripture as he did when he tempted Jesus in the desert. He introduces two related chains of thought that weaken our love for God:

"If God loved me, I would never be confused or doubtful. I would know exactly what I was supposed to do every day of my life, and I would carry it out faithfully. But I am confused and doubtful; therefore, God does not love me."
"If I loved God, I would never be confused or doubtful. All it takes is faith the size of a mustard seed to cast mountains into the sea. I never get any results when I pray, not even when I pray the Infallible Prayer ('Thy will, not mine, be done'). I don't have enough faith to get what I want from God. This isn't working. I quit!"

The remedy: "I will boast of my weakness, for when I am weak, then I am strong" (2 Cor 12:10).

Making a choice in life

In the Second Week of the Exercises, Ignatius discusses three methods of recognizing God's will:

Undeniable intervention by God: Paul on the road to Damascus, Matthew at his tax collector's table, Peter, James, and John called while fishing at the Sea of Galilee.
Alternation of consolation and desolation: how Ignatius himself was drawn to follow Jesus as Peter, Paul, Dominic, and Francis had.
Consideration of rational alternatives: draw up a list of advantages and disadvantages for each alternative; in the business world, some people call this a "cost-benefit" analysis. Speak to yourself as if you were a friend helping a friend. Choose what seems best after you have done the best analysis of the situation that you can.

"Get out of the boat"

When Peter thought he saw a ghost walking toward them on the water in the middle of a great storm, he said, "Master, if it is you, tell me to come to you across the water" (Mt 14:22-38).

This is absurd! What else would a demon do but say, "Get out of the boat and walk"?

And yet, this crazy method of recognizing Jesus worked. Peter walked on the water and knew for certain that it was Jesus.

The only drawback to using this method is that if it is not Jesus who is approaching on the water in the middle of a great storm, you are liable to drown. Such is life!

Some other suggestions

I do not recommend the use of "Gideon's Fleece" (Judges 6:34-40), but you may come across those who do. In my opinion, it is a "faithless generation" that demands that they be led by "miracles, signs, and wonders." While our God is alive and well, and can and does work miracles every day, He also speaks to us in the voice of our conscience and in "a still, small voice" (2 Kings 2:1-14). We should be docile to his most gentle promptings.
Aids to developing a deeper awareness of God's presence and activity in one's life: retreats, spiritual direction, confession, spiritual reading.
Practice. The more we obey, the better we get at obeying.
"Do your duty."
- Be faithful in small things (St. Therese of Lisieux).
- "Find your India in Rome." "Find your Rome in Buffalo."
- Pay your bills.
- Suit up and show up.
- Think. God gave you that thing on top of your neck for more than just eating ice cream and making whiny noises about how hard life is.
- Obey the Commandments and the Precepts of the Church.
"Be still and know that I am God" (Ps 46:10). Or, as the excellent and deceased atheist author, Douglas N. Adams, wrote so often: "Don't panic."
- Pay attention to your feelings, but don't be misled by them, no matter how strong they may seem: recognize, reflect, accept; but act with wisdom and sound judgment (RRAA).
Pray the Infallible Prayer: "Thy will, not mine, be done." If you find yourself saying, "Yes, I prayed that, but I still didn't get what I wanted," then that is a clue that you need to pray the Infallible Prayer some more.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is a 'vocation'?

It means "calling" and is from the Latin verb, "voco, vocare," from which we get words like vocal, vocative, invoke, invocation, convoke, convocation, avocation, evoke, evocation.

Does every Christian have a vocation?

Yes. We are all called to be "holy and righteous in His sight, all the days of our life" (Lk 1).

Does God have a "perfect will" for my life?

Yes and no.

Is it possible to know God's will for my life with certitude?

Yes and no.

How long should I put up with desolation and frustration before trying something else?

It depends.

How can I know whether God's will is for me to marry?

Find a person willing to marry you.

Has God already picked my marriage partner for me?

No.

So you do not believe that "marriages are made in Heaven"?

No. They are made on earth.

How do I know whether I have a vocation to be a priest or religious?

Find a diocese or religious order willing to accept you.

Why are your answers to these questions so short?

Because.

Don't you think you should treat these questions with more respect?

Not today.

Will you write more later?

Time will tell.
Just because people have good questions, it does not follow that I have good answers.

Does God want me to be more generous in supporting The Station of the Cross?

Yes.

Are you serious?

Sometimes.

Can you recommend some aids to doing the Spiritual Exercises?